Long Distance Relationship With Crush On Another Guy?
I’m 21 and i’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriends for almost 4 years. I am away at college and the whole “long distance thing is really starting to wear me thin. I think we have good relationship, we’ve been through many tough times including helping me through a tough illness. We are very close and we talk almost every day, but I can’t help thinking about other guys sometimes. Our relationship is very serious and we have both talked about moving in together and marraige and children etc. We have a very healthy relation, but I have just been noticing this guy around my school that I am very attracted to, and having more self confidence, am dying to flirt with. I love my boyfriend but I can’t help thinking that I should date other ppl. I really don’t want to break up with him because I love him dearly, but I just don’t want to regret not dating other ppl, but I know to suggest this would crush him Any thoughts?
I have been in the exact situation as the guy you have a crush on twice. So please take my advice in this and just make and educated smart decision.
The first time I was presented with this situation I kept reminding the girl to look into her heart and ask is this really what she wanted, she said it was and broke up with her boyfriend. We were together for five silent minutes before she stood up and simply said ” I made a mistake” and left never to talk to me again.
The second time this situation came around I again warned the girl to search inside herself and ask is this really what she wanted or was it just a fling, could she see herself without him, could she ever love someone else the way she loved him, and she did not break up with him, they are still together and going strong.
Please think very deeply about whether you want to leave him or stay with him. Decisions like this are tough and take time, don’t rush to a conclusion. Whatever you choose in the end persist with. Guys hate to be jerked around.
I did the whole LDR thing for 2 years while finishing my degree….I think you owe it to your partner to let him know. Maybe you can have an open relationship where you can casually date other people?
Either way, it is a serious discussion you need to have. Your relationship will be stronger for it, trust me!
I’m in the same situation, and what I keep telling myself is that if I broke it off with my bf, I would never find a guy who treated me as well. He would never be OK with an open relationship, and I don’t think I’d be OK with him seeing other people either. So, that only leads me to staying with him, while innocently flirting here and there. Hopefully for both of us, these feelings will go away when we can be with our bf’s in the same area code.
At 21, it sounds like you’re almost out of college. I would think twice before doing anything.
You’re going to have temptations your whole life. I’m sure you’re boyfriend has had them also and not acted on them.
It’s called self-control and being an adult. If you don’t love your boyfriend, then that’s a different story. Break up with him and flirt with the new guy.
I know what your feeling its lust. I have been with my boyfriend 3 1/2 years,and we live about 45 miles away from eachother. I love him to death and would never break up with him but i sometimes find me look at guys , its only human. Its how you act on those thoughts is what counts , you are just trying to meet people you in a new place
well, in my own words you should maybe say to your boyfriend that you guys need to take some time off and see other people and if that is not right then you guys will get back together. Another way is to just assume that this guy you’ve been seeing in your school is not worth it and you should treasure what you have with your current boyfriend.
If you are having these feelings it is best to tell your guy. Otherwise, you run the risk of cheating on him and it seems like you don’t want to do that. You are young, and it is natural to be curious. How many other guys have you dated? If your current guy is the only one you owe it to yourself to try out new things.
Just don’t keep the guy hanging on by a string. If you are going to break it off then do it right.
Maybe he has the same thoughts as you. You should tell him you love him but there are more guys out there you want to see.
Or you could have him move in with you and live your life together but you will never know what to do so I suggest you pray about it! Just don’t cheat on him.